How You Deal With an Annoying Coworker – Ask #HR Bartender
I’ve written before about working with people you don’t like. Here’s a similar situation. A co-worker that grates on your very last nerve.
We have a person in our office who does her job well, but makes a lot of annoying noises. She clears her throat constantly, very loudly. She has very long fake nails and types using her nails which is very loud throughout the office. She talks to herself and makes loud sighs.
She is nice, but so annoying that people tend to stay away from her. I am the office manager and I don’t know what to do.
Before talking about possible solutions, I think we need to point out some realities about this situation.
Everyone has at least one annoying habit. I have them. You have them. We all have them. So this situation isn’t completely about one person’s annoying noises. You have to be prepared to address everyone’s annoying behaviors, including your own. Take a moment to process that thought.
Bringing it up opens the door for a discussion about everyone’s annoying habits. It would not go well to tell one employee, “Stop making clacky noises with your fake nails.” and not talk to the person who burns popcorn in the microwave and smells up the whole office. Or the person who hits “reply all” for every single email message.
If you can’t address them all, you will look like you’re playing favorites. Talking to one employee and not addressing all of the annoyances will come across as targeting one person. It could hurt working relationships.
This certainly doesn’t mean that the issue shouldn’t be addressed. But before taking action, let me toss out some questions to consider:
- Does the annoyance stop people from doing their work? Obviously, if productivity is suffering, then something must be done. There’s nothing in the reader note about the impact these noises have on getting the work done. Be prepared to address that aspect if confronting the person.
- Should this matter be addressed by the office manager? I understand in this case the employees have gone to the manager about their concerns. I’d be interested to know if the office manager has the same concern? If so, why hasn’t the office manager addressed it earlier? Tacit approval – the employee could ask the manager this very question.
- Would it be more effective for an employee to discuss it with their co-worker directly? This matter has escalated to the point where the office manager must handle it. This is why companies should consider conflict management training. The manager doesn’t have to wear a striped shirt all the time. Especially if the manager doesn’t share the same concern, they could coach employees on how to handle their own conflicts.
- Is this a one-person issue or something that should be addressed on a team level? The manager and employees expressing concern need to be prepared to hear their own annoying habits. Enough said.
- Is this matter worth potentially straining working relationships over? Given that we all do annoying things from time to time, is this really worth mentioning? Or should employees learn to be more tolerant?
- Are there options that don’t involve confronting the person? The first thing that popped into my mind when I heard this story was allowing headphones in the office. With open offices being popular these days, maybe employees who find the noises distracting can wear headphones. It might solve a whole list of problems.
I wish there was a one-size fits all solution for this situation. It happens often. I believe the most important thing to do when these situations happen is think about the possible outcomes. We all need some self-awareness and maybe this person doesn’t realize what they’re doing. On the other side, maybe their noises are trivial compared to someone else’s annoying habit. Bottom-line: each of us must own our quirky behaviors.
Image courtesy of Sharlyn Lauby
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