As we approach mid-term elections in the U.S., there’s a lot of talk in the media about “incumbent” being a four-letter word. Doesn’t matter what political party you belong to. All this talk about getting fresh blood into Washington reminded me of a post I read a while ago by Jason Seiden titled “Real Life Fail: Lessons from Mr. Smith Goes to Washington“.
The big takeaway for me in Jason’s post had nothing to do with our government. It was the last line…”Are you all in?”
That simple question has big implications for us on a personal and professional level.
For example, if I asked – would you do business with an organization that was doing unethical and unprofessional stuff, what would your answer be? My guess is you’d say, “No way!”
Now let’s add to the situation that you’re benefiting from this organization in some way – either financially or some other personal way. If right this very moment I could name the organization and give specific examples of unethical practices. Conflicts of interest with the president and senior leadership. Not following corporate policies. Not communicating with employees. Mismanaging money.
Is your answer the same? Or is the answer, “Oh, I don’t know anything about that…” Or maybe ” I’m not good at this office politics stuff.”
It’s not really a far-fetched question. And, it’s a dilemma people face often. Just look at the news and all the companies and individuals being hauled up in front of congressional committees. What makes the situation especially hard is when the organization is doing well (or appears to be doing well.) The company has lots of money and star performers. You enjoy what you’re doing with them. You don’t want to walk away because you want to believe the good.
Face it, you’re not “all in” if you’re not willing to listen with open ears and eyes and develop your own opinion. You don’t have to give the naysayers all your time and you don’t always have to agree with them. But to dismiss a contrary view with “Oh, I don’t know anything about that” is nothing more than sticking your head in the sand. And, at that point, you’re giving the unethical behavior tacit approval.
A fellow consultant called me recently. He was upset about a decision a non-profit board was voting on and asked for an opportunity to speak with the officers privately. His request was ignored. After the meeting, he asked one of the officers why. The reply?
Oh, I don’t know anything about that…I just do what I’m told.
Are we facing what Jason Lauritsen calls “unproductive harmony“? Where our work or personal culture reinforces conflict avoidance when there is some real or perceived benefit. I don’t see how you can be “all in” if you’re afraid to engage in some productive conflict.
Image courtesy of jvh33
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Shaun Emerson says
Sharlyn…Your post speaks to a very important issue…To take it a step further, I recently wrote (http://bit.ly/a97V4X) about a session I attended where Sherron Watkins talked about the Enron scandal…It was her take that not only do many people not speak up but could actually engage in questionable behavior due to cultural dynamics and compensation plans that actually incent that behavior. What do you think?
Kathy Clark says
Conflict is never easy and certainly not fun, however, when leadership or management is paid to make the right decisions for the organization, it is their responsibility to present opposing arguments when it comes to ethical, legal or even logical decisions for the organization. Organizations that have leadership that just “does what they’re told” are doing everyone a misservice and should step down from the position. It’s not right for the stockholders or nonprofit donors to have weak leadership that threatens the longterm viability of the organization.
Charlie Judy says
no question that people who give hoot wrestle with these things day-in day-out. and at the risk of appearing too much of a self-promoter, i thought i’d also share a post i wrote related to this matter: “What’s your Ideological Discount?” http://bit.ly/d0sP9b. I think the equation for all employees as to whether or not they are “all in” is some semblance of: (x) economic currency (money) + (y) socio-emotional currency (people) (z) ideological currency (purpose). finding the right balance in this equation (i.e. neither of these are interdependent) is the trick. thx, as always, for thoughtful post.
Amybeth says
I’m a big believer in respect: we can disagree while still respecting each other. I think that’s the problem here – a lot of folks think that you cannot do both & therefore are either unwilling to listen or unwilling to speak up. Anyone who knows me knows that I am full of opinions but will also listen to what others have to say. I enjoyed your post because it was thoughtful and really calls out those who turn a deaf ear to things they KNOW are wrong but say nothing because the situation is favorable to them. I cannot believe the number of things that are going unchecked these days simply because we want so badly to believe in something that we were promised would change our world. Having ‘hope’ doesn’t eliminate the need to do due diligence when it comes to our own well-being and that of future generations.
Marian Nielsen says
In addition to Amybeth’s posting and the misnomer that anyone who disagrees is seen as being disrespectful, there is also the perception and thought that they are not loyal when in actual fact, it denotes the opposite because their actions in disagreeing with unethical/unprofessional practices demonstrates that they care deeply and would defend ‘right’ as against the ‘wrong’ even when others don’t want to rock the boat and sometimes when ‘group thinking’ or ‘group conformity ‘ is evident which is the example stated in the above article which is indeed sad and a shame. It’s better to be a robot and not think at all if we all go along and do as we are told.
Sharlyn Lauby says
@Shaun – Thanks for sharing your post. I’ve heard great things about Sherron Watkins but never heard her speak. I agree with her that corporate culture is a huge factor in ethical behavior.
@Kathy – You hit the nail on the head with your comment about being paid. I believe that’s the challenge. People don’t want to walk away from the paycheck or the benefit, so they turn their head.
@Charlie – Thanks for the comment and sharing your post. Love the equation! I might have to borrow that sometime.
@Amybeth – Excellent point. Many people think conflict and respect are mutually exclusive. And speaking up after the fact doesn’t have the same effect. Thanks for commenting! (And congrats on your new gig with ERE!)
@Marian – So true. It’s a mistake to confuse disagreement with disloyal. Thanks for sharing your insights.
Gina DeLapa says
All of this reminds me of a great scene from the film “Manhattan,” where Meryl Streep tells Woody Allen, “You knew my history when you married me — your analyst warned you.” And Woody Allen retorts, “Yeah, but you were so beautiful, I got another analyst.”
Truth is bigger than we are. Problems won’t go away just because we ignore them. On the contrary, they’ll probably grow.
At the other extreme, we must not get so caught up in attacking injustice that we end up attacking other people — or otherwise falling into an end-justifies-the-means mentality. I have worked with folks who were so embroiled in exposing others’ faults that they became monsters themselves.
@maestroCG
Sharlyn Lauby says
Love the quote Gina! And you’re right – as much as we want to believe we can fight injustice, there are times when it’s better to walk away and save yourself the frustration.