Last week’s jobs report had some good news. Fewer initial jobless claims were filed. Hopefully this means that unemployed people are getting jobs. Or employed people are finding new jobs (creating openings for the unemployed).
With any job change, there always comes the “do I or don’t I” decision about sharing your employment experience. You got it, how to handle the exit interview.
Many people will tell you not to burn a bridge. They follow the “if you can’t say something nice” rule. And there’s some truth to that advice. Everyone should think long and hard before severing a relationship with someone. After all, never is a really long time.
But I do get concerned that the advice is misinterpreted as “don’t offer constructive suggestions and feedback”. There’s a big difference.
I like to believe that any organization who goes through the time and expense to ask for feedback in the form of an exit interview is looking for ways to improve. As a result, well crafted suggestions and recommendations will be taken under consideration.
Please note: I didn’t say mean, spiteful, bitter, and nasty commentary.
While you might feel better giving your former boss and/or company a piece of your mind, take a moment to consider what it would accomplish. I know, taking the high road stinks. But ya gotta do it sometimes.
Instead, think of the person who is going to replace you.
- Make a mental note of the things they shouldn’t have to suffer with the way you did.
- Come up with a suggestion to fix the issue. (again, a public flogging of your supervisor is probably not an option.)
I’ve had employees tell me lots of terrific ideas during exit interviews. Many of them were later implemented. That’s not burning a bridge. Think of it as building a bridge on your way out the door.
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Shaun says
With the way people frequently move to new organizations, you never know when you are going to reengage with a former colleague. Can’t tell you how many times it has happened to me. Taking the high road is always the way to go.
Kathy Clark says
I agree, the fact of the matter is most people leave a position because there was something (pay, job satisfaction, culture, supervisor, coworkers, etc) that made them look for another job. And sharing constructive, diplomatic thoughts on how to improve the organization can be a good thing. What would not be good is if the organization asks the question, gets feedback and does nothing with it. That just perpetuates the problem. But definitely, leaving in a positive way is always wisdom. You just never know…… Good post!
Ginger says
Well said! I left a company once – it was a super awkward (for me) situation. I hadn’t been there long at all, but another opportunity came along which I could not pass up. My boss was very understanding, but the HR Director was a bit less understanding. I had to do an exit interview, and at first I was nervous about it, but I decided to be completely honest with them. The HR Director asked questions about what they could do when they refilled the position. I shared several suggestions that I thought would make a big difference. Even though she was not happy about having to refill the position, I think she appreciated the feedback.
Kirk says
Awesome insight as always, Sharlyn! Most people on the way out really want to make it known that they were unhappy. Burning bridges helps no one. Some of my former co-workers left both positive and negative feedback in their exit interviews. Since then, some of their comments have been taken to heart and changes implemented.
Great advice!
Kelly Dingee says
This item is so timely for me – just had a friend of mine – RN supervisor in an ICU have a falling out with her boss and “mutually agree” to leave. She (the friend) was snapped up within 24 hours by another department in the same hospital….but the former manager? They had burned a bridge – there’s something that needs to be said for “mutual respect” when someone terms ….especially if you think you’ll ever need to call on that former employee for information or run in a small professional circle.
Sharlyn Lauby says
@Shaun – Thanks for the comment. The world is getting smaller all the time.
@Kathy – I like your use of the word “diplomatic”. Great approach to consider.
@Ginger – Thanks for sharing your story!
@Kirk – Thanks for adding to the conversation. Your point about balancing the good with the bad is sound advice.
@Kelly – Great story and so true! Even when there is a decision to part ways, making sure both people keep their dignity intact is important.