One thing I plan to do a lot of at the upcoming SHRM Annual Conference is networking. Sure, I intend to network with a beignet and maybe even a Sazerac Cocktail . . but, more importantly, I’m meeting with a whole lot of really great people.
One of the best books I’ve read about networking is Keith Ferrazzi’s “Never Eat Alone”. It’s kinda ironic that I read the book while traveling (alone) from a conference. But I digress.
Before I share my take-away from the book, let me first explain what networking isn’t:
- It’s not handing out your business card to everyone you meet
- It’s also not giving your resume to everyone you meet
- It’s not about calling to ask for favors
- It’s not something to cross off your ‘to-do’ list (as in “I networked today.”)
Networking is about building relationships. Let me say that again. Networking is about building relationships. And, that’s what the book talks about … how to build relationships.
How do you build relationships? For me, I think of listening, smiling, sharing, offering assistance, being helpful and connecting. Networking is about giving, not about getting.
What have you given to your network lately?
BTW, if you happen to be going to the SHRM Annual Conference, I’m giving a presentation on strategic planning called “Fail to Plan . . Plan to Fail” on Tuesday, June 30. You can read more about it (and everything else about the event) at the SHRM Conference Blog. Hope to see you there!
You May Also Like:
Hi! I'm Sharlyn Lauby, an HR pro turned consultant. I created the HR Bartender blog so people would have a friendly place to discuss workplace issues. And since, over the years, I've developed an appreciation for the culinary arts (translation: I'm a Foodie) you'll see some of that here too. So, pull up a stool and order your favorite drink . . . the bar is always open.
{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
Not to be completely off-topic here… But I absolutely love beignets. My mom makes them often, and I always snag a handful! Two types-powdered sugar and cinnamon-sugar. My mouth is already watering!
I love your piece, I often run networking sessions on our leaderhsip programmes and find it’s this connection to building relationships that makes it seem more human and something acceptable. I’d add being curious to your list and then making sure you appreciate the small things like common interests, holiday destinations etc, they all help the connection.
Oliver – Curious is a great word for building relationships. Thanks for sharing!
Ben – I’ve never had cinnamon-sugar beignets. Sounds yummo!
So true that networking is about giving rather than getting. Another way to put it can be using the “Halo Strategy” – engaging in networking with the attitude of social generosity. Once you build relationships, share your network with others. Talk up the talents of those in your network; assist in making others look good, further connections by bridging people together.
I am looking forward to your session “Fail to Plan . . Plan to Fail”; even have it on my #SHRM09 planning calendar.
And, of course, a Sazerac or some other tasty libation.
Stellar post, Bartender. Brava. I think things started going bad when “impact” and “network” turned from nouns into verbs. If you think about creating and nurturing relationships it’s pretty hard to commit some of the more egregious networking errors.
Roolvoel – I like the ‘halo’ strategy. Nice. Look forward to seeing you in New Orleans. Please come up and introduce yourself!
Wally – Spot on (as always). The key is building a meaningful relationship is time.
When we gonna do a tweetup in #NOLA anyway?
Michael – There must be a tweetup going on somewhere. If not, we will have to find time to create one. Look forward to seeing you there!
Can’t you just feel it when the give vs get ratio gets out of whack, when it feels like you’ve been getting and not giving? I seem to be more in tune with this now than ever before. What else am I noticing? I think a solid, awesome network allows others to give what that can when they can – with acceptance and not judgement. Nice post – timely for me. Thanks Sharlyn.
I’m naturally shy so networking is a little difficult for me. Your post helps clarify how I can make it less so. By getting into the spirit of giving I can network in a way that’s more in tune with my nature.
Thanks for the post!
Spot on Sharlyn! My favorite saying is “make happy those who are near, and those who are far will come”. I sat next to someone at a meeting the other night who had been laid off from his dream job and was about as low as a person could get. By the end of the evening we were like old friends and when we connected later on via a social network site, he messaged that meeting me was a breath of fresh air. I like being considered a “breath of fresh air” vs. a
P-I-T-A (which is what you are if you only look to get and not give)!
I can relate to @CCC – My natural tendency is to stick with the people I already know but over the years I’ve learned how important networking is if I’m going to succeed. With that in mind I’ve learned to forget myself and my fears and in doing so I’ve met some really wonderful people such as our wonderful HRBartender